Cousins Off To College

How does one go from being a care-free kid to suddenly an adult with adult responsibilities and adult expectations, while still in the body of basically, a teenager? Well, it doesn’t happen instantaneously, it happens very slowly, over the years, despite one’s immature mind wishing it was so. If it could happen in a flash, that would be magic, wouldn’t it? Diving headlong into marriage, when one is still only seventeen, is a recipe for disaster, but how many young people back in the fifties and the sixties, did exactly that, if not among the lucky ones, like my cousins Robbie and Angie, whose parents were determined they were going to college, whether they liked it or not.

Angie had been a so-so student, but found herself attending the University of Florida, having no idea what she wanted to be when she graduated. Her only real problem in her mind, was whether or not she was going to get that Jaguar she had let her parents know she desired for her upcoming birthday, and which boy she would spend her weekends and holidays with. Robbie, on the other hand, had only wanted to enlist in the military, and become a fighter pilot. When he tried to join when only seventeen, Uncle Frankie had stormed into the recruitment office, and was told where he could retrieve his son from, after finding out he was not of age. What happened to Robbie when they got home is reminiscent of what happened to my sister when she couldn’t tell my Dad where I was to be found. In August he found himself enrolled at Florida State University, like it or not. The one good thing he got out of it, was getting accepted into the Florida State University Circus, as a trapeze catcher..After a dismal year, and failing grades, he re-enlisted, and eventually became a decorated fighter pilot in the Vietnam War, then making a career out of the military. His sister, to her credit, stuck it out for four years, getting her R.N. in nursing.

In the meantime, Ann and Tony headed for their very small trailer in Key West in a dilapidated old Mercury that once might have been quite nice in a better day and age. Their wedding had been beautiful, so they both were told, though the looks on both their faces in the photo of them exiting the church afterwards, told everyone of the doubt they both had, that they had done the right thing. Ann’s mother had made her gown, with a train so heavy, it was difficult to pull it down the aisle behind her. The reception had been held at Ann’s family home, with her Dad serving chilled champagne, out of shiny new garbage cans full of ice. Along with gifts from so many relatives, and Tony’s family, and items from Ann’s Hope chest, the old Mercury was filled to the brim.

The Honeymoon

The Honeymoon was a one-night stay in Daytona, and even that was not what Ann had planned, or hoped for. Tony let her know on the way there, that there was a baseball game on T.V. he didn’t want to miss. Ann loved baseball no more than she loved football, although she knew more about the game because of her Dad’s love for the game. He had even taken her to some of the Jacksonville’s Sun’s games, but she was more interested in eating a hotdog and fries, and watching the crowd. Surely, Ann thought, he can’t prefer watching a game to consummating his marriage, can he? Even after taking a shower and donning her sexy negligee, Tony’s interest was only on that game. It wouldn’t have been their first time, but by-passing that sacred ritual was not what she expected at all. But by that time, she was so tired from the day’s events, she soon fell asleep.

Ann had no idea what awaited them in Key West, but bore her disappointment in silence the next day on their long drive there. Soon enough they came to the infamous seven mile bridge over which Ann prayed they would traverse with no mishap. Finally, the end was in sight, just as the old car stuttered, then died, and somehow they coasted into a wayside restaurant, where they called for a pick up truck to take them into Key West. The two brothers that picked them up, cheerfully helped them unpack their belongings into the trailer, where they arrived just before midnight. Little did Ann know this was just the beginning of their many mishaps and misfortunes that plagued their marriage.

Not that Ann did not feel something akin to love, but closer to pity, for the man she now realized was not the intelligent, steadfast man she had believed him to be. He was nice looking, except for the scar on the left side of his head, where he had backed into the propellers of a plane warming up for takeoff on the aircraft carrier he had been stationed on. He had then spent over six months of his service time, in rehabilitation after barely surviving that accident, and was left with excruciating migraine headaches throughout the nine year marriage.

Time Spent in Key West

Their time spent in Key West was more than a disappointment to Ann, since it turned out they could barely afford the payments on the eight by twenty foot trailer they inhabited. Ann looked for an office job, but was disappointed to find there were no jobs, especially for service wives, and she couldn’t picture herself as a waitress or sale clerk. However, she spent much time taking the bus into Key West, exploring a lovely little library, well stocked with her favorite science fiction books, written by classic writers like Robert Heinlein, Isaac Asimov, and Andre Norton, also A.E. Van Vogt, who was new to her. She also learned there was a Yoga program on TV, taught by Richard Hittleman, out of Miami, which she followed along with every morning at 0800, military time. They had paid to have that joke of a car repaired several times times, then finally Tony found another sailor to take it off their hands.

Slowly, Ann realized how poorly Tony was at managing their meager income, and took over paying their bills herself, feeling far more qualified, since she had taken a bookkeeping course, when she had been taking a typing course also. She also learned that Tony had no skills at being a handy man, such as her father had been, and fortunately had brought along a small tool box her father had given her.She quickly had hung a few pictures, and put up a rack in the kitchen for kitchen gadgets and tools, feeling quite proud of herself. Then she prayed their small refrigerator and stove would continue working, and took their clothes to a laundromat about a half-mile away. There was no air conditioning for people like them, in those days. Constant heat and humidity kept them constantly wet and sticky, even right after their baths in the evening, before bedtime. To add insult to injury, a truck spraying for mosquitoes came around every night, spraying them with God-knows what kind of chemicals.

Looking back on the situation, Ann really couldn’t remember exactly when they consummated their marriage. Tony had probably been a virgin himself, being quite inept at husbandly services, or duties, or whatever it was in his eyes. She really didn’t know, for they never talked about it. However, not two weeks later, she came down with a horrible urinary tract infection, which she suffered through that night, because he had a baseball game. That night seemed endless to Ann, the pain was so excruciating.To Ann’s horror, she found herself wishing that Tony would somehow leave this world, leaving her with whatever life insurance the Navy provided for enlisted men. The next day, he managed to take her by bus to the dispensary, where a Navy doctor made her feel totally humiliated and somehow dirty. However, she was given antibiotics, and finally, after a week, the pain went away.

A New Job, A New Home

Just as Ann was beginning to think she would have to call her parents, and beg back her bedroom, the local office of whatever civil service job called her, and she happily accepted a job as filing clerk, and the financial situation eased up for the three month period of the temporary only job. She had barely made a dent in the stacks and stacks of filing that needed to be done, but was told they didn’t have the funds to keep her on.

Foolishly when they saw the extra money coming in, they had traded in the old eight by twenty trailer for a brand new twelve by forty, or was it sixty? Either way, it felt like living in a castle in the nicely furnished home, with modern appliances, and a washing machine. The news that the job ended after just three months, was devastating for there was no way they could afford it, when the money ran out. Tony assured Ann it would be okay, for he could get a part-time job at the EM Club. That worked for about two weeks. It never occurred to Ann that they might hire her there, or that she could look for a waitressing job. They both were young and ignorant, and with no one to advise them, they packed up their things, and got a ride back to Jacksonville for Ann. Tony left the keys to the trailer with the salesperson that sold it to them, never knowing how or if he resold it.

Brief Return to Jacksonville

Upon returning to Jacksonville, Ann was dismayed to find that her parents had gotten rid of all her personal possessions, including her record player, and hundreds of 45 pop hits from the fifties. But she was home, and discovered in the meantime, that her sister Elaine was pregnant, and the boy responsible no where to be found. In this day and age, Ann’s parents were totally shamed, keeping Elaine indoors, and well hidden from the neighbors. They had found an attorney who found parents to adopt the baby to, once it was born.

Just a few weeks later, Tony called, and said he had found an apartment to rent, actually a one room efficiency, he was sure they could afford. So he showed up in a car a buddy had driven to Jacksonville for the weekend in, and they headed back to Key West. The efficiency was on the second floor of an old Key West home, and the owner was delighted to have such a “nice couple” renting it to. It actually was not too bad, except for the pull-out bed, but it made a decent sized room when bed was put away. Ann happily returned to her science fiction books, and to Yoga with Richard Hittleman, on their tiny black and white T.V.

Back to Key West, the Library and Science Fiction

Ann had been introduced to science fiction sometime in her eleventh year in high school, by her friend Kathy, with whom she had gone horseback riding with a few times. Actually, Kathy had loaned her a book by Robert Heinlein, called Starman Jones, which was given to her by her brother. Ann had never read anything like it, actually about a boy that wanted to go to Star Academy and be a navigator on a starship. In it, Heinlein described how space could actually be folded upon itself, in order to navigate through the stars. This theory by Heinlein, who was a mathematician himself, fascinated Ann. In the story, the boy meets up with a hobo, after running away from an abusive stepdad. The hobo, just happens to be a decommissioned navigator, and gives his treasured library of textbooks to the boy, who happens to have a photographic memory, and saves everyone on the ship on which he happens to get a job as a cabin boy. Up to that point, Ann had no idea there was any kind of literature called science fiction that could be had. At that point, the Nancy Drew books, had no more appeal, although she still enjoyed other good novels. So hat’s off to Kathy’s brother, who otherwise had no claim to fame than that he was a close friend of no other than Elvis Presley, when they grew up together in Arkansas.

As Fate would have it, Ann discovered that her best friend Cindy from High School had paid her a visit and let her know that her husband Phil had joined the Navy, and that he was to be stationed in Key West. Ann was delighted, for when Phil and Cindy had gotten married, they both had enrolled in a seminary for their Church in Missouri, and Ann thought she would never see her friend again. They both were musically talented and had hoped to serve their church in as music directors, with being a singer. As it turned out, Phil was assigned to the same squadron as Tony, and as soon as they were assigned Navy housing, she would join Phil there. Phil was enrolled as a petty officer due to his year or so of college. And they had a newborn baby girl so the were given a two bedroom unit, much nicer than Ann and Tony’s efficiency apartment. So much of their time was spent together, doing their shopping in the daytime, and playing Pinochle in the evening, once or twice a week.

Since Tony had come up for taking the test for 3rd Class Petty Officer, Ann had hopes, their finances might improve, but as to they explained, there was only one position open, and he was officially “quoted out”. Without her friend being there to take her to the Commissary to shop, Ann’s days there would have been pretty lonely. The coming year passed quickly, and eventually Tony was discharged, and they headed for Massachusetts to live with Tony’s parents until Tony and Ann found work. By the time they arrived there, Ann found out out she was pregnant, and a whole new chapter in their lives began.

As thrilling as I hope this chapter of my life must be, I must end this blog here for now. Ann must still go through more tribulations, before she begins to get closer to her quest for understanding life’s mysteries for herself, including understanding why she was doomed to lose baby after baby, in her efforts to become a good Catholic wife and mother, even though Tony never attended Mass with her, and she avoided Confession, which made her terribly anxious, and often had to not partake of the Lord’s Supper, because of all the imagined sins she kept committing before Sunday morning arrived.. That all that and more must be dealt with before the more exciting side to life could be learned., so please stay tuned.