Disclaimer about Religion, Spirituality, and Beliefs

It’s a real shame in our 3D world, that so many of our youth grow up without realizing the great gift that youth and health really are. For the few who are born into families that are educated and have spiritual principles to help guide themselves and the children, they are indeed fortunate. To me the most important factor to guide our children, is impressing upon them, the fact that we are more than what we seem to be in these physical bodies, with all the restrictions we must face any day. Religion is one modality for trying to impress on their young minds, that leading an ethical life is to their advantage. It also brings with it a sense of heritage, in the sense that we are all part of a culture, with the history of our particular race of beings stored within these tales.

But as I found out in my early years, religions do not unite us as a human race, but once one joins with one religion or another, it automatically begins to separate us from each other. In other words, the dogma spoon fed its members, raises its head, telling you that you are now one of the lucky ones following this faith, or another, and that all other religions, or teachings, are false, and only those following your faith will be saved from hellfire and such. I realized quite young, that even the followers of Jesus of so many denominations, have so many different views, so how does one know, truly in one’s heart, what is Truth, and what is not? As my own personal embarrassment revealed to me, no one can go about outwardly preaching that one religion or another is the “real” Truth, without getting oneself into deep cow manure.

Let me state, quite plainly, before I go about sticking my big foot in it, that what I think I have learned as being the “Truth,” is from my own personal perspective, and that perspective has continued to grow and evolve as I grow and evolve. However, I have found it to be interesting and useful in forming my own philosophy of life, and I offer what I’ve learned as a guide you may find useful, even if only for entertainment purposes. LOL If my own Dad taught me anything, you can’t go through life with that chip on your shoulder, thinking you are the only one who knows anything, or being glum all the time, because of all the disappointments that life has dealt out to you. Every single person has their own lessons to learn, and sometimes seeing what other people have had to deal with, helps you to get a different perspective on your own unfortunate events. Later when I get into some of the specific teachings, I will talk about the laws of Karma, but looking at even this big obstacle with a sense of humor can help.

My Cousin Eddie

Ann had just turned sixteen, when she was delighted one day to discover that Aunt Matilda and Uncle Bootsie had moved to Arlington also, from Lake Forest, a really old neighborhood way out Northside to Westside of Jacksonville. They had three children, Eddie, Earl, and Rosalie, the youngest being Eddie, was just a year past me. Rosie was three years older, and Ann really would have loved getting closer to her, but she and Earl had already married and left home, although she had never allowed Ann to get that close to her. However, Ann was thrilled when Eddie showed up on his dilapidated old bike, breathing heavily, not used to bicycling all over Arlington, as was Ann. Actually, it was the summer before his senior year, and he was looking for a job, so he could buy his dream car, an Olds 88. In the meantime, he managed the days he wasn’t working, to bike or hitch a ride to spend his time sitting by our pool, which Ann’s father had built for their enjoyment.

That pool was another source of physical activity Ann’s family and friends enjoyed. Her Dad just decided one day, they were going to have a pool, and with his shovel and rusty wheel barrow, began to dig a big hole in their back yard. It took a while, for he hired helpers from among the workers at the liquor company he worked for. The pool was not a prefabricated one, but had bricks laid, one by one, for the walls of the pool, and the fence around it. Even neighbors showed up when Ann’s father let them know of all the “free dirt” one could dig and cart away themselves. Her Dad was also a master of pouring cement, lovingly mixed in his rusty wheel barrow, and poured to make a patio and side walk around the pool.

So now the summer before their Senior year, Ann’s cousin Eddie and she spent hours sun-bathing, for they imagined they were Sun-worshippers of ancient Egypt, as they watched “real” clouds swirl across beautiful blue skies. The movie “Cleopatra” had been recently released, and Eddie and Ann pretended they were Egyptian royalty lazing away by their Temple pool. Neither of them really knew anything about true Egyptian culture, religion, or magic, but what they didn’t know, they made up for with vivid imaginations.

Eddie worked and saved his money, and one day not too far into the coming school year, he proudly drove up in his Olds 88, and now they could depend on Eddie to pick up Ann and whatever friends were available, for skating, or the nearby drive-in theaters. Now that’s something we rarely see any longer. Eddie didn’t seem interested too much in dating, or cried on Ann’s shoulders, when they turned him down. He made it plain his highest goal in life was to be a hair-dresser, not just to ordinary females, but to the Hollywood stars themselves. At least Ann got free services, but she didn’t like having her hair teased and sprayed heavily, so she lovingly refused his offers to style her hair.

It is to Eddie that Ann can thank for meeting Anthony, and for learning a little of the modern dances of that day. So when a girl friend suggested they go to Mayport, the nearby Naval Base, Eddie was thrilled, teaching her new steps to a popular song by Andy Williams, not his usual of titles. The only real challenge to this plan, was getting in, for civilians could only go there at the invitation of one or more of the enlisted men. Her new friend, Pattie, whom she had met one night going to a high school dance held by the Lion’s Club, assured her getting in was no problem. And true to her word, when they arrived at Mayport, she jumped out of the car, and waved down a couple of sailors just leaving the building where one had to sign in to get a sticker, allowing us to enter the base. So Pattie, Eddie, Susan and Ann entered the Base, and gleefully drove to the EM Club. As promised by Pattie, there was a live band, and although liquor was served, the rules were quite strict in making sure the one served was of age, with proper ID. Eddie, Susan and I didn’t mind, we were just there for the dancing and live music, and when Eddie requested it, they even played Andy Williams’s catchy tune, and Eddie and I took over the dance floor to demonstrate our cute and snappy dance that fit the popular tune to a “T.”

It seemed to Ann that she was destined to meet this handsome young man of Italian lineage, who sidled up to Ann’s and her friend’s table, though who could only do a slow dance, and before the night was over, managed to get her phone number. He had dark hair and brown Italian eyes, and a ready smile, and as Ann grew to know him over the coming year, his sincere, honest personally drew her to him, though she wished in her inner heart that Gene would return and propose, though he had hardly suggested any such thought. Ann weighed that against what seemed like a sure thing, and when Tony returned the following summer, and proposed, very true to his word, she reluctantly accepted his tiny little diamond ring.

It happened one night that Tony was visiting, and they were outside enjoying the cool when Tony excitedly pointed out a falling star and claimed he had asked the Maker for a sign that Ann was his true love, and there it was, the “falling” star. Tony had explained to Ann that he was a devout Catholic, and that he wanted a Catholic wedding, and for his children to be raised in the Church. (Oh, God, what would Martin Luther think??) But by then it was the next summer after Ann’s graduation, and she had been working for the IRS, which offered her a promotion if she stayed, but that was not enough to deter her, so she accepted his proposal..

Also she agreed to taking the church’s classes for converts, and they planned their wedding for September. When Tony had learned of Ann’s disappointment at not going to college, he promised her that one day he would send her back to college. Ann believed him, and he was so sincere about his Catholic faith, she figured that would be no problem, for she had fallen away from her own church, and attended the classes with the Priest at the church just down the road from her little Lutheran church. How strange life is, Ann thought, as she earnestly attended classes, not too different from the ones she attended when she was an adolescent. So here she was, about to marry this man, who was as different from her, as she could have believed, Catholic, Italian, and a sailor, to boot.

Eddie had bowed out of her life, not long after she met Tony, for he too had jokingly asked her to marry him, when they both graduated, and Ann had gently told him she couldn’t marry her cousin, because she wanted children. Ann sensed she may have really hurt him, but felt there was a deeper reason why Eddie had sought the safety of marrying his cousin, and claimed they didn’t need to have children. So he took off to California, and that was the last time she saw him.

So now it was decided, Gene hadn’t blinked an eye, when he had shown up on that motorcycle, and Ann had told him she was marrying another man. The stage was set. Ann had decided, she even flew to Boston to meet Tony’s family, and realized how different their upbringing had been, but stubbornly, she clung to the illusion that this was what she wanted. She was sure the differences didn’t matter, although they had nothing in common not even a real interest in religion, though that was to be revealed later.

Man and woman, too, only learns through tribulation, it seems, and Ann had to learn for herself. We all have to make our own mistakes, and unfortunately, these cannot be undone, once they are set into motion. If only someone, some mentor, had guided her, and told her how important all these decisions are, especially when we are young, and how different our life could be, if we stuck to our ideals, and made choices based on real principles, of what you really want out of life. No one suggested these ideals to be lived by, that ways can be found, if you really want something, like a higher education, not to give up. There were these things called Student Loans, or either agreeing to teach for a while, but no one pointed that out to Ann. Nor to set her own Self-worth high enough not to settle for a mate, just because he was convenient, even if they make attractive promises, which they probably can’t keep.